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From The *Somewhat Twisted* Mind Of Dulux-Oz

Why I Oppose Paid Games

Rating: 7 votes, 2.86 average.
First of all, this is not aimed at any one individual or group of individuals. Instead, it is an explanation of my views on an activity, not on the people who engage in that activity.

For the record, when I use the term "paid game" I am referring to RPG sessions where the Players pay the GM to run the game for them.

As the title of this blog indicates I am opposed to paid games. I find the idea... distasteful, even cheap. While I hold no ill will to those who do engage in paid games, it is not something I can support or even condone. Others will, of course, hold different views, and I respect the people who hold those views, even though I may disagree with them and they with me.

Role-Playing Games are exactly that: they are games. Games are ment to be a fun activity, typically shared between friends. True, most activities grouped in under the "games" umbrella are competitions, but RPGs are different, even unique in that the Players don't compete with each other, nor do they compete with the GM - well, at least not in a properly run RPG, anyway. Yes, there are a handful of board and other games which are co-operative, but even with most of these the Players are competing against something, usually the clock or some other random element such as a deck of cards or such-like. No, it is only in the RPG hobby that the unique aspects of this "non-competition" are found.

So these games are unique, and are shared among and played by friends. As a GM I construct my games with care because I'm presenting something that I can enjoy with people I want to spend my time with: my friends. When I put together a new group I'm not looking for just Players; I'm looking for friends, both old and new. When we sit down and game we're not just rolling dice and playing at being "Murder-Hoboes"; we're building a relationship between friends and telling personal stories. I find it... uncomfortable to pay or be paid to be someone's friend.

Can you imagine paying someone to play a game of tennis with you? I don't mean as a coach or with both of you being paid to play as a spectacle, but just as a "friendly" game between two people? I know it could happen but its certainly different from just two friends having a game.

Then there's the idea of corruption. As a paid GM, do I go easy on the Players because I'm afraid that if I'm "too tough" they won't come back and therefore I won't make as much money. Or as a Player to I insist of having an easier time of things for the same reason. I know that this can happen in a regular game, but surely the temptation is greater when there's a direct, tangible reward on the table. We all know (those of us who have gamed for a while) that the best games and the best stories are the ones where the Players aren't handed everything on a silver platter (or even a copper platter, for that matter). And even if as a player I don't want the GM to go easy on me, how do I know that this isn't happening even sub-consciously on the GM's part when the GM's getting paid, and therefore I'm not getting a "true" RPG experience. Again, this ties back to trust and to friendship: how can I trust a "friend" who is only there because money is changing hands?

On a different note: How much hubris does a person have to have to think that they're a good enough GM to charge others for the privilege of playing in one of their games? I've been GMing for over 30 years, and I've gamed with a number of other GM's over that time who were as good or better than I am. And where as I'm one of the most arrogant, stuck-up know-it-alls that I know, I don't have the sheer balls to think I'm good enough for people to actually pay me - well, actually, I do. I just don't think that much of myself to actually go ahead and charge people. And I can't imaging any of the other GMs I know - the true Master GMs - changing people either, for the same reasons that I'm outlining here.

The more I wrote, read, re-wrote and re-read this blog the more I realized that the best analogy to this situation was one of sex versus "making love". Sex is fun, it is shared between two (or more) people (depending upon your personal level of kink), and is usually done by those with a relationship; with friends (or lovers). True, you can participate in a "one-shot" one-night-stand; in a series of "casual" encounters with people you know; but the best sex is when it moves beyond just sex into "making love": when the campaign of the physical act takes on the spiritual aspects and you find yourself sharing an intimate story with someone you trust and respect and genuinely care for: your "friend".

While you can certainly pay for and be paid for sex, you can't really pay for or be paid for "making love", because the trust, intimacy and "friendship" just isn't there.

And its the same (to my mind, at least) with paid games: you can't really get the full effect of the game when you have to pay someone to run the game for you - its like paying someone for sex: you get the physical act, but you're missing out on the deeper, more spiritual level.

So why do people pay for a game? I suspect its similar as to why people pay for sex - its "easier" than developing a relationship with a "friend", or its because its quicker to pay someone for a "one night stand" or series of "one night stands" to satisfy their passing "fix" than it is to take the time to find and develop the friendships necessary to fully enjoy this fantastic hobby. Its the "quick fix" versus the "delayed gratification", where everyone knows the delayed gratifications is way, way better in the long run!

I know it can be hard to find a gaming group - its hard to find a true friend and partner, too. But my advice to Players (and GMs) is stick with it, keep looking, and don't limit yourself to just the "popular" gaming systems but expand you horizons and try different systems. A lot of good GMs run games in different systems than the "popular" ones, and we play Role-Playing Games, not just a single game. And if you still can't find a game, seriously consider running one yourself: you become the GM - it's really not that hard, and yes, everyone can do it. After all, most RPGs are designed to be GM'd by 12 year olds - you're smarted than a 12 year old, aren't you?

And don't get me wrong - there's nothing wrong with showing your GM some love and appreciation, especially if they do run a good game. Chipping in and helping out your GM with some of the costs of running the game (buying Rulesets, Tokens, Maps, or Adventures and other Modules for your GM, or even your own Standard FG License) is a fine way to say "Thank you" for putting on a good game, as is the exchange of Christmas and Birthday Gifts as friends do (as my own group does).

So that's my take on paid games. I think SmiteWorks has taken the best stance they can with the topic, and I applaud them for the stance that they have taken as a decent compromise to the situation. But me personally: I don't like paid games, I don't support paid games, and I don't believe paid games are necessary; just deceptively convenient. I also strongly believe that those who participate in paid games are missing out on the full experience of the RPG hobby, which I consider is a real tragedy.

Good Luck and Good Gaming,

"And may all you rolls be 20s"

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  1. Stuart's Avatar
    Absolutely agree, I think "distasteful" is the most apt descriptor.
  2. Bidmaron's Avatar
    Wow is this really a thing?
  3. LordEntrails's Avatar
    "Distasteful" I agree. Following through with the sex analogy, it makes me feel similarly as to when I think of prostitution. I have trouble finding a moral objection to sex for money, but it (like paid GMing) gives me a sense of ... sorrow and regret. I guess I would feel better about paying for play (& sex) if it was in addition to a 'free' relationship(s) and not as a substitute or alternative.

    I understand social anxiety, and the difficulty many have finding friends (or lovers), but it truly is worth the adversity to find that group of friends to play an RPG with. Its possible, the RPG community is full of unique people with every type of difference.

    Yea, paid GMing/gaming is a thing. I've seen people over the last year advertising for such on various forums and blogs and a few video teasers. I'll be surprised if it ever becomes very successful over a wide spectrum.
  4. Full Bleed's Avatar
    The fact that some are willing to pay for someone to provide them with a more "professional" gaming experience strikes me as no less reasonable, or distasteful, than paying someone to cook them a meal.

    I know that my time is my most valuable commodity. And the only reason I don't run pay-to-play games is because I seriously doubt anyone would be willing to pay me what my time is worth. But, make no mistake, in order for me to justify running more than the games I do run... I'd need to put a price on that commodity.

    Welcome to the wide world of capitalism. Which, btw, is the only reason this industry even exists.
  5. dulux-oz's Avatar
    I would debate that there is anyone who is more "professional" than those of us who have been GMing for a number of years.

    I take your point on your time being valuable - I consider my time valuable as well - but it come back to the idea of "Prostitution" - just because you charge people to have sex with you doesn't make you better at sex (or more importantly, better at "making love"), it just makes you better at milking people for money for an activity that the rest of us engage in and enjoy for free.
    Updated September 30th, 2017 at 15:18 by dulux-oz
  6. Full Bleed's Avatar
    Charging someone doesn't make you better. But in the real world the cream does usually rise to the top. Quality of service and demand usually sets the market value of something.

    And I know for a fact that I don't approach the games I run as a "professional" (largely, of course, because I'm not being paid). And I bet you don't either. So I'm not sure why you're question the veracity of the assertion. I might show up 5 minutes late... or pick up a phone call... talk to the wife... talk about politics, religion, or something personal that happened to me that week... I might even belch amoungst friends... curse unnecessarily or say something provocative that has nothing to do with the game... take a bathroom break when I could hold it... eat and drink without muting... let a player derail the game... be sloppy with my syntax or recollection of something. I would, in short, run the game exactly how I felt like running it. And so long as it seemed like everyone was having a reasonably good time, and the game was moving, I'd be ok with it. So, pretty much nothing like I am when I'm doing something "professionally".

    I would also argue that GMing is, indeed, a more tangible skill than you seem to indicate. Like public speaking. Or teaching. Storytelling. Writing. Etc. I've seen teachers that have been teaching for 30 years that I thought were horrible. And teachers that had only been doing it for 2 that were awesome. Experience is not the sole indicator of quality, let alone professionalism. Charisma, Wisdom, and Intelligence--for example--aren't just stats in a game. Real people posses these traits, too. And what they do with them matters.

    And there is certainly a VAST differentiation in the quality of GMing out there. And quite a spectrum of the kind of campaign any particular GM might be good, great, or awful at. Some might be great at story telling, at running efficient combat, at varying the behaviour of enemies or NPC's, keeping the players moving, subtlety across the board, rules mastery/application, the art of compromise, conflict management, improvisational skills, and on and on and on. Every cut of meat isn't the same.

    I just don't agree that the people willing to pay for a GM are like johns at all. On the flip-side, I'm more inclined to think people who think they're "good GM's" are probably like all those guys that think they're awesome in bed. I mean, how many guys have you ever heard say they were terrible in the sack? I know of none. However, women will tell you otherwise (when speaking about their exes, of course... their husbands and boyfriends are awesome. )

    A lot of people play golf for nothing. Some can get paid to do it. Almost everyone can grill a steak. Others get paid to do it. Some people do wood-working as a hobby. Some people get paid to do it. Some people love to paint and draw. Some people get paid to do it. Some people can play guitar. Some people get paid to do it. Some people spend time on forums helping people they don't know figure out how to set up their networking. Some people get paid to provide technical support. Some people program for a hobby and share the fruits of their labor for nothing. And some people get paid to do it. Some lawyers and doctors get paid millions. Some do a lot of "work" pro-bono.

    Getting paid to do something that you're good at doesn't make you a bad person. And paying someone for something they're good at doesn't make you socially deficient. Maybe it just makes you practical. If you go over a friend's house and they cook a meal, you won't hold it to the same standard that you would hold a $100 meal at a restaurant. And that's fine. But, ya know, maybe you want that $100 meal instead of mushrooms in the sauce when you don't like them, or medium-well when you want medium-rare, or white wine instead of red.

    So, yeah, if you think GMing is--inherently--a worthless, skill-less, valueless commodity that anyone can do at the highest level... then, sure, no one should ever consider paying for it.

    Others, as you've acknowledge in your opening, probably beg to differ.
  7. dulux-oz's Avatar
    No, I don't think GMing is inherently (or otherwise) a skill-less or valueless commodity - I don't think its a commodity at all, and anyone who treats it as a commodity to be bought and sold is missing both the point and the true joy (the deeper, more meaningful aspects) of gaming, just like anyone who buys and sells sex is missing out on the true joys (the deeper, more meaningful aspects) of "making love". Not everything is nor should be subjected to "market forces", and I maintain that GMing is one of those things.

    Look, I find you arguments unconvincing and/or "false flags", but I'm not going to argue with you further because it is obvious neither you nor I will convince nor be convinced by the other. I've laid out my arguments to my position and you've laid out yours. If people want to engage in paid gaming or not then its up to them, just like its up to the individual to oppose paid gaming if that's their view. I and others are not in favor of it; you are, and so let's just leave it at that, shall we?
  8. LindseyFan's Avatar
    I of course agree 100% with Dulux-Oz. I think everything he said in the OP and follow-ups are pretty spot on in assessment of this bizarre habit. A comment that struck me though is how the game play experience may be altered because those that pay may expect an easier time (ala pay-to-win). I now know I personally could never be paid... I crave the tears of anguish that can only come from a solid TPK. I wash my dice in them (both in the physical and virtual world). There is nothing like seeing how trembling fingers type and mispell: "bbut do do I gget a ssssave?" Ctrl+F3 - my macro for the response "No!" hehehehehehe

    Seriously though, how much fun is a person paid to tell you about a treasure you found? Compare that with someone who waited all week to make sure every copper you place in your pouch is done so with blood soaked hands. Does a paladin truly feel brave confronting beatable foe after beatable foe? Or does she truly live when she tells her friends to run while she holds back the horde?

    I pay to watch movies. I play with my friends to experience a different life. That and to collect those salty tears... love 'em!
  9. LordEntrails's Avatar
    GMing is a valuable skill. Not everything that has value should be traded for money. Or has the same value when it is traded for money. imo.
  10. LindseyFan's Avatar
    Kind of like CPR.
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